The Spacebar vs The Underscore

Shift + ‘3’                    Shift + ‘-‘

what do they mean to you ??
‘Shift  3 ‘    on the keyboard gives you ‘#’ and the latter comes up with a ‘  _  ‘  i.e. underscore. and together, the two form a deadly (and now an almost indispensable , irresistible) pair.
but first let us go into a case study.

2001 , january 26th :
it was a republic day morning when the country saw one of the most devastating earthquakes this generation would ever witness. it caused too much destruction in the district of bhuj in Gujarat. a huge loss of life as well as property , and naturally, newspapers ,news channels , all were flooded with the headlines screaming the  horrors of the dreadful calamity.

*fast-forward 14 years *

2015 , april 25th :
I am sitting in a theatre with two of my friends watching the movie ‘age of ultron’ (with 3D goggles on)……(which further means I’m watching it in 3D -.- )  , released the preceding day. and all of a sudden, tremors are felt . later the building is closed for the day.
It later came to be known as the ‘Nepal Earthquake ‘. (there’s actually a long story to it and I’ll be telling it later sometime)

naturally , the news were again flooded with cries all over. the wrath it subjected the people there to,  was unheard of.

but something had clearly changed all this while. the media had come up another dimension of theirs. ‘the social breed of media’ which referred to the social networking , microblogging and whatever be the gobbledygook.
back then, in 2001, there was no facebook, no twitter , no whatsapp , google existed,but was in it’s kangaroo pouch. so naturally people didn’t know what a ‘hashtag’ was. it was just used to denote house numbers in postal addresses , or for balance enquiry on phones.

now, when i opened my fb , the wall was dripping with hashtags of all kinds . to name a few ..(and believe me when i say ..a ‘very’ few of them )…



 then there was the over-sympathetic lot which drained out all of their sympathy through their hashtagish weapons.


the wise ones , grabbed this opportunity like every else (not really)


(mulayam was too mulayam to let himself in)
and Rajinikanth ji , as always ,was ready in position to become the scapegoat for the meme-cooks.

In the end to deliver the coup de grace,
‘Angel Priya’ was feeling (damn) worried.


So is the underscore the new space bar? lions hunt in pairs they say.
enter hashtag and underscore, the killer pair, which clearly renders heavy on the space bar.
Darwin stated ‘survival of the fittest’ as the mechanism driving the evolution process. and this…is proving to be a classic example of the theory.
we no longer study,party , sleep , go out…
it is rather preferred to #study ,#party ,#naacho_bc ,#soundsleep #nightout and all of these often with ‘douchbag’, ‘more douchbags’ , ‘extended douchbag ‘ and 37 others .
seriously bro!? 37 others?
Is it a baraat or something ?

my parents no longer give me ‘aashirvaad’. we nowadays exchange #parrypawna and #loadsofblessings.


now, har aag k liye paani hota hai…
and…..and…there you are!
I came across this fb page called ‘Hashtag Haters’. they are the luddites who just don’t want to accept it at any cost. they are often the same lot you find at an antiquities auction (though I silently admit I’m one of them)

There is an international society whose sole purpose is to inform the world that all scientific facts are false. among other things, its members maintain that the earth is flat and that the distance between the earth is 3,221 miles, not 92 million miles .

But seriously , the only one who ends on the losing side is the ‘spacebar’. it now seems as if he’s simply retired.

” all the fucks I gave ….. were they for nothing ??? “


Something seriously needs to be done now for the poor one. else, as the theory of evolution explains – ‘the more a certain part is used ,the more it develops. and the not-so-useful organs disappear over time.’ . it won’t take long when you’ll see laptops with THESE big ‘shift’ buttons , ‘3 ‘ and ‘-‘ at the bottom of the keyboard , and spacebar, adapting itself to the habitat, packing up and moving away to compress itself and become roommates with the ‘escape’ button .

I have taken an initiative , my username on various social media handles is – the.uncertain.heisenberg   (when it could have been the_uncertain_heisenberg ).
so go green!

P.S: the poor guy still gazes at me with such eyes, with ‘USE ME’ written on it.

P.P.S: I was ‘marked safe’  with ye, wo, falana ,dhimka and 21 others.

diwali at airport…hmmmm..
how come someone all of a sudden starts to feel excited , at dehradun ? with 2 others ?  ….(I have another, more specific word for it – orgasm )

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