Always The Bridesmaid, Never The Bride   – the plight of younger siblings         

A younger sibling, particularly in an Indian family , is as insignificant as that plastic thing at the end of shoelaces. Do you even know what it is called ?

le…sigh. that’s the point. You don’t! No one does….(well those things are called aglets)

And no! don’t even think about the ‘laadla beta’ concept, let me finish it first.  My elder brother is the ‘laadla-est’ beta in our family (or a clan I would call it) , even after being the oldest child of the generation in a joint family with over 17 members.

And where’s my role in it ?

My father, mother, brother, grandfather, nana…all are the eldest of their generations and among such stalwarts I feel like always the bridesmaid, never the bride

so am I merely a food-taster to the king ?

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Connecting to my counterparts…..

do you remember that lovely tricycle you used to ride, as a child ?

Then you should even recall that there was something wrong with the bell. It was somewhat loose, and at times sounded like a conch shell.  Is it  to be told now as to who did it ?

Do you even remember that bigger cycle ? there was always something wrong with the chain , and you never did it.

And the bike,… guess where that ugly dent came from ? and the seat was far from spongy, because someone had already laid his ass on it before you could.

Even the cradle when you were an infant. It always made a cranking noise and no one knew why.

As a child we’ve all worn clothes which didn’t look ‘that much new’. And as for me…. I’ve even had the raincoat. 😛

As a little child, I had a school-tie, the one with a ready-made knot and a black rope like thing drawn through it.  While I wore it as an ordained heavenly fate , he used to flaunt his long tie and tie a knot daily. Moreover, mine had HIS name written on it!

I don’t know why he was deemed so good at batting and I was the most-wanted…… fielder and bowler (who bowled only baby overs) .    and it really pissed me off when I used to get a by-default coupon code called ‘kachchi pudi’ …..a creation of some self-obsessed, deliberately-overcaring elder sibling.

At weddings they are the stars…..

   “haaye mera pota…haye mera bhatija”.

“ye wala kaun hai…..?”
“acha ye bhi hai….beta wo chair le aao “
(to elder one) – “beta pehchana….buaa ko nhi pehchana?”
(to me)  –     “_____________(fuckall)______________”
me:
them:
me:
them:
It seriously used to be a time of severely acute existential crisis.

And this went on… until I’d had enough of it. And then I left my home and went out , to live all on my own. Only to return a couple hours later, being unable to find a place more worthwhile to pee than my own home.

Occasionally, I got some preference and  ‘sudden spurt of love’.

For eg. 1) when I broke my hand.

2) when I broke my chin.

3)when I got chicken pox.

Is that what I need to keep on doing?     And yes….  I did receive appreciation at times when I scored good marks but that used to be as long as I completed the sentence- “I scored 97.6 percent” . half life of two minutes.  (data isn’t hypothetical).True story.

This ‘younger-ness/hood’ instilled into me a sense of insecurity and inferiority right through a very young age.

Looking back, my track record says I pee’d (and even shat) in school more than he did. The score was around 6-0 or 7-0 . (I wish the data were hypothetical 😛 ).

But I wasn’t someone who’d give in that easily.  No evidence in support of that but still yeah , true story .duh!

Now it’s high time I’ve been suffering all this.

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TIME TO PUT AN END TO IT

My goal in life was always to be less than him.time to turn it the other way round. With the motto-

“younger is the new elder”

 

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